Her Rebel Cowboy: Rodeo Knights, A Western Romance Read online

  “I don’t want to leave you, specifically. I want to help you, but I need to get a tractor to get your car out.” He cleared his throat, resisting the urge to throw her on the back of his horse and haul her up against him. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

  She looked over her shoulder at the car, and then back at his horse. He saw the flash of fear in her eyes, and he swore. He knew then that she didn’t want to wait there. “You’ll be safe in the car. Dry. You can turn on the heat.” He didn’t want her out in the rain on his horse…but at the same time, some part of him didn’t want to leave her behind.

  Yeah, she would be safe there. Nothing was going to happen. They were already on the ranch property, and no one would be coming by. But hell…it didn’t feel right to leave her.

  She looked at the horse again, and then back at him. “I’d rather ride with you.”

  His gut clenched, and he had a sudden image of her riding in front of him on Lightning, leaning back against him while he held her securely in front of him. At the thought of her nestled between his thighs, his gut tightened with the surge of lust he hadn’t felt in too damn long. Shit. He didn’t have time for this, for a woman, for reacting this way. For hell’s sake, he had a possible murderer hunting him, and a bull riding career to resurrect in three days. He did not have time to notice her like this. But he couldn’t help it. He just couldn’t stop staring into her eyes, from wanting to chase away the shadows haunting her, from needing to protect her…

  No. He had to keep his distance. He had too much going on. She had to stay in her car, not park herself on his lap for a longer ride in the rain. No way. He opened his mouth to tell her that, but the words that came out weren’t what he’d intended. “You want to ride with me?”

  The moment he asked the question, he regretted it…and knew it was the only thing he wanted to ask. It might not make sense for a shitload of reasons, but there was nothing more he wanted in that moment than to have his thighs on either side of hers, his arm around her waist, anchoring her back against his chest, his coat tucked around her to keep her protected from the storm. He wanted her where he could make sure she was safe, and the only place that fit that bill right now, was on the back of his horse in his arms.

  Relief flashed over her face. “I don’t want to be in the car.” Her voice was quiet, almost a whisper, but he still heard the desperation. “I would love to ride with you.”

  His gut shifted at her word choice. I would love to ride with you. Shit. He liked that. He liked that she had no doubt, that she trusted him completely, even though he was a stranger. She was right to trust him. There was no way in hell he’d hurt her. If he took her with him, her safety would be completely dependent on him. Completely. Damn. He liked that. No, he didn’t like it. He loved it. He stood taller, and whistled low under his breath. His mount, Lightning, trotted over, and stopped beside him. Wyatt gathered the reins, and then held out his hand to her.

  For a long moment, she didn’t move, and he tensed. Was she going to retreat to her car? Decide she was safer in a ditch in her car than on a horse with him? Logic said she was, but something primal deep inside him resisted. “I’ll keep you safe,” he said quietly.

  Her gaze flicked to his, and he didn’t miss the flash of yearning in her eyes, coupled with a vulnerability that made his chest tighten. He knew then that no one ever kept her safe. No one ever took care of her. She took care of herself, and the people around her.

  He wanted to give her that gift. He wanted it to be him who gave her even a few minutes of feeling like she didn’t have to fight her battles herself…or at least this battle, for the next hour. He flicked his fingers, beckoning her toward him. “Come on, Noelle. Ride with me.”

  She took a deep breath, and she lifted her chin.

  He knew then, before she spoke, before she moved, that she was going to say yes. Anticipation roared through him, a fierce, roaring sensation of rightness as she slowly lifted her hand.

  His entire body hummed in anticipation as he waited for her to set her hand in his, but the moment he felt her fingers in his, peace settled deep inside him, all the way to his core, and he knew that this woman had come into his life for a reason, and he was going to find out what it was.

  Chapter 6

  The moment Noelle set her hand in Wyatt’s, she felt like her world had come to a crashing stop, hovering in suspended abeyance, every one of her senses completely focused on him. His hand was warm, a stark contrast to her frozen fingers. He didn’t seem to notice or care how muddy her hands were after her climb up the embankment. Instead of pulling away, his fingers closed around hers, cradling her hand in his.

  Her heart seemed to stutter, and heat poured through her, starting in her chest and radiating through her belly and down her arms. Dear God. She wanted him. Not just an attraction, but something deep inside her soul was calling out for him, to him, needing his touch, his kindness…him.

  Suddenly terrified, she jerked her hand back and folded her arms over her chest, trying to fight off the longing coursing through her. Her heart ached, and she was suddenly filled with the most haunting sense of loss and emotion, tearing through the shields she had erected so carefully over the last four years, making herself numb enough to handle everything. Suddenly, emotions swelled over her, a flood of every emotion she’d held at bay for so long, all of them triggered by the simple touch of Wyatt’s hand.

  Tears flooded her eyes, and her breath became labored as she fought to hold herself together. She saw the surprise on his face, and she instinctively turned away, hugging herself as she stumbled back toward the embankment. “I think I’ll wait in the car,” she managed to croak out. Dear God. What was wrong with her? She couldn’t even breathe. Couldn’t think. Couldn’t talk. There were so many images flashing through her mind. The moment when she found out David was dying. The moment when she’d realized that she would have to live life without him. That sense of loss and loneliness. The need to be loved and supported that she’d crushed so ruthlessly when she’d realized she had to be the strong one. Anger. Loss. Loneliness. Betrayal. And need. God, the need was almost overwhelming. A need to be held, to be loved, to be supported, to be understood, to be nurtured, to be accepted exactly as she was.

  Somehow, some way, for some reason, Wyatt had unlocked everything inside her that made her human, that made her feel, that made her unable to hide the depth of her need for connection…all of them luxuries she couldn’t afford, emotions that made her vulnerable, feelings that terrified her.

  She didn’t want to feel them. She didn’t want to acknowledge how badly she wanted to be more than what she was. She couldn’t face how badly she needed her life to be more than she had allowed it to be. She had to become numb again. She had to.

  She reached the embankment and stumbled over the edge, her feet sliding as she lost her balance. She was vaguely aware of Wyatt calling her name, but she didn’t stop. She couldn’t stop. The tears were too heavy, and gravity was too strong, dragging her down the embankment in a rush of mud and sliding shale…

  Her feet suddenly slipped out from under her, and she yelped as she fell backward–

  Right into Wyatt.

  His arms snapped around her waist, catching her against him as they slid down the embankment together, the rocks and shale tumbling down into the rising water. They landed with a splash in the water, with her trapped against his chest as they fell backward, with her landing in his lap.

  The heat from his body tore through her, and the strength of his frame surrounding her, like a solid shield protecting her, nurturing her, keeping her safe. She knew she had to get up. She knew it was ridiculous to be sitting on the lap of some man she didn’t know, but she couldn’t make herself move. She just froze, her eyes closed, her fingers wrapped around his forearms. She was trapped by the feel of his body encircling hers, by his warmth penetrating the cold that seemed to go so deeply inside her, by the steady thud of his heart against her back.

  The water lapped ov
er their feet, a rhythmic cold undulation over her boots, and rain hammered them, but still, she couldn’t move. She felt like she was cocooned in a surreal moment, an oasis in a hurricane where the wind and rain and cold couldn’t touch her.

  Wyatt shifted, and she felt him lean forward until his face was next to hers, his chin almost resting on her shoulder. “What happened up there?” he asked.

  She closed her eyes, gripping his forearms even harder. With him behind her, she couldn’t see him. It was as if his strength, the feel of his body against hers was a fantasy she could lose herself in, not a real man that she had to deal with.

  “Noelle?” His voice was warm and deep, wrapping around her like a blanket enveloping her heart. “What did I do to spook you like that?”

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I just…I’ll just wait in the car.”

  He laughed softly, a laugh that felt like a warm caress. “Sweetheart, as heartless as I may be, there’s no chance I’m going to leave you behind when you’re in tears, drenched, and trapped by a river that’s rising faster than I like. When I said you could stay behind earlier, I didn’t realize how fast the water was rising. I’m happy to sit here until you’re ready to go, but leaving you behind stopped being a possibility when I saw your face after I touched your hand. The fact that the water’s rising fast seals the deal.”

  Noelle scrunched her eyes shut even more tightly, as if closing her eyes could somehow protect her from the kindness he was wrapping around her, that he was making her crave so badly. “I know how to swim. I’ll be fine.”

  He laughed again, drawing a tiny smile from her, because he’d noticed and caught her attempt at humor. “Because swimming upriver in a storm-surge stream is definitely a good plan.” His arms tightened around her waist. “I don’t mind waiting until you’re ready. I’ve always wanted to sit on this particular embankment during a storm, but I’m always so damn busy I never take the time, so this is all good.” He stretched his legs out on either side of hers, as if he were on a tropical beach enjoying the sun. “Nothing like taking time to enjoy life, right?”

  This time, she was the one who laughed, a tiny, heart-wrenching laugh that forced the tiniest crack in the emotions threatening to overwhelm her. “The rain is lovely,” she agreed. “I especially like how it mixes with the mud as it runs down my neck and under my coat.”

  “I know. That icy chill is the stuff of fantasies. And getting my ass frozen by cold mud is a damn gift. I can’t think of a better place to hang out.” As he spoke, the mud gave way, and they both slid a few more feet down into the water.

  Wyatt dug his heels in, stopping their descent. Noelle could feel the muscles in his thighs flexing as he braced them, and her heart did a little flip. He was pure strength, rugged, outdoorsy strength, not a man who had already given up on life. So different than what she had lived with for so long.

  Noelle opened her eyes and looked at her rental car, askew in the rising water. The water was halfway up the tires, and she could see that it was still rising. “How high is the water going to get?”

  “I don’t know. It’s a hell of a storm coming in.” Wyatt’s arms were tight around her waist, and he sounded relaxed, as if he could truly spend the next couple hours sitting behind her, holding her, keeping her from sliding the rest of the way into the water.

  Noelle sighed. “You’re really going to sit here with me until I’m ready to go, aren’t you?”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  “Why?”

  He was silent for a moment, and she felt his arm tighten around her waist again. Finally, he spoke. “You want the answer I’d give most people, or the truth?”

  From the way he asked the question, she knew the truth was going to be raw and uncensored, a gritty truth that she wasn’t prepared to handle. She wanted to be hard and numb again, not open the door to anything that would keep her from pulling herself together. He was a stranger. She didn’t want raw and gritty from him, and she didn’t know why he’d even offered it.

  But as she sat there, tears still mixing with the rain on her cheeks, her heart still aching, her body cold and numb, suddenly she didn’t want numb and emotionless anymore. She wanted to feel something. To be forced to feel. To be given the freedom to shiver, cry, yearn, and ache. “Truth,” she whispered.

  He leaned forward, his breath warm against the side of her neck. “I would sit here for hours until you’re ready to get up for one reason.”

  She looked down at her hands still wrapped around his forearms. “What’s that reason?”

  “Because you make me want to.”

  Tears filled her eyes again, but this time, they weren’t tears of grief. They were tears of… God. She didn’t even know. “Why?”

  He sighed. “Because life broke something inside you, and I have never needed anything in my life as much as I need to fix it.”

  Broken. His words settled inside her. Broken? Was she broken? She closed her eyes. “I didn’t feel broken until you took my hand. I thought I was fine.”

  “We’re all like that, until we hit that landmine that blows apart all our pretenses and shields.”

  Noelle stared at the muddy water bubbling past her. His words made sense. They made her feel normal, as if it was okay for her soul to be broken into so many pieces that it felt like they would never fit together again. She took a deep breath. “Thank you for saying that.”

  “You’re welcome.” He fell silent, and the only sound was the storm. The rain hammering on her car. The rush of the water. The roar of the wind. The sound of rain pelting her coat…

  And the sound of his breath, steady and even, waiting.

  Noelle took a deep breath, and she felt her emotions begin to settle. Her muscles began to loosen, and the tightness in her chest eased. She became aware of his body still framing hers, protective but not overpowering. She glanced at her hands, still tightly gripping his forearms. Why did she want to hold onto him so much? And why did he want to sit here with her? He answered the question, but only partially.

  “When I was growing up, Bunny used to tell me that if you tell your sorrows to the rain, it will wash them out of your heart.”

  “Really? Did it work?”

  “I can’t remember. I don’t think I ever did it. I considered myself too much of a badass to have sorrows, let alone talk about them.” There was humor in his voice, a self-deprecating awareness that made Noelle smile.

  She lifted her face to the rain, and let it wash over her cheeks. It was cold, but it was also fresh and cleansing. She closed her eyes, feeling each droplet hit her eyelashes. Sorrow and sadness seemed to well up inside her, a grief that wanted to reach out to the rain coming down. She had so much to say to the rain, that she had no words. So she just sat there, letting it wash over her face, until the shivers from the cold penetrated so deeply that she couldn’t stop shaking.

  Wyatt sighed. “Time to go, Noelle. It’s too cold out here. I can feel you trembling.”

  She didn’t want to get up. She didn’t want to go with him. She didn’t want to stop shivering, because the cold took all her attention, making it impossible to think about David, or about how good it felt to be in Wyatt’s arms. But his words made her aware of how badly she was trembling, of how cold she felt deep inside, as if she had finally found the darkest place inside her and unlocked it.

  She didn’t know why this moment, why this man, why this rain had unlocked the shields she held around her heart, but it had. It hurt. God, it hurt. But at the same time, it felt like the weight of a thousand lifetimes was suddenly lifting from her chest, allowing her to breathe.

  She suddenly realized that she wanted to breathe again, truly breathe, no matter how much it hurt to do so.

  Wyatt shifted behind her, and she felt him stand up. Deprived of the warmth of his body, cold air rushed across her back, and she suddenly felt a thousand times colder. But just as quickly, he moved in front of her, standing calf deep in the river. His icy blue eyes settled on her face, and
her heart seemed to stutter in her chest.

  God, she’d forgotten how intense her reaction to him was.

  He held out his hands to her. “Let’s go.”

  He didn’t give her a choice…and that felt good. She was too tired to make any decisions, to decide when she’d had enough, to be ready to ride with him. She’d been the one making every single decision, even the heart-wrenchingly difficult ones, for the last four years, and it felt good to have someone make one for her, just this time, just this moment. “Okay.”

  He cocked an eyebrow. “Do I dare take your hand again?”

  She laughed, a laugh that felt rusty and good at the same time. “We can try.” She set her hands in his. The moment her palms touched his, heat rushed through her, but this time, it didn’t feel scary. Maybe it was because he’d sat in the mud with her. Maybe it was because she was too cold to be scared. Maybe it was because the rain had indeed washed away some of her pain. It didn’t matter. She just knew that she felt better, and it was because of him.

  His eyebrows went up, and then he grinned. “You’re still facing me. That’s a fantastic start.” He gripped her hand tightly. “Let’s go, sweetheart. Shelter is calling us.” He started up the embankment, his grip strong and firm, his body angled to give her leverage as he used his body as her anchor to follow him up.

  Noelle hesitated for only a brief moment, glancing back at her car. Somehow, she knew that once she went up that embankment with him, there was no going back. He was too real, and her reaction to him was too intense. She’d told Kate no complications, and Wyatt was all about complications…but she wanted them. She wanted them with every fiber of her rain-drenched soul.

  He paused and looked back at her, his grip still tight on her hand. “Coming?”

  She studied him for a long moment. His intense blue eyes. The shadows in his eyes. The warmth in his expression. He was strong and solid, but at the same time, she saw the sorrow in his eyes, and realized suddenly that he needed someone to lean on, just like she did. He’d needed to sit there on that embankment as much as she did. Wyatt was strength, but there was also something broken inside him, something that he needed her to fix.